Attachment disorder is a general term for conditions that causes people to have a hard time connecting and forming meaningful relationships with others. While you might not have much of a say over the attachment behaviors you develop as a child, there are steps you can take to develop a more secure attachment style as an adult.
Therapy can help you learn more about why you feel and think the way you do and is key to overcoming insecure attachment styles. The Therapist can help you:
- Unpack your childhood experiences
- Identify patterns that pop up in your relationships
- Develop new ways of connecting with others and creating intimate relationships.
Children who have experienced trauma, abuse and neglect in their early lives are often said to have attachment difficulties. This means that their early, close relationship with their parents did not provide sufficient nurturing for social, emotional and intellectual development.
This is likely to have resulted in them feeling negative about themselves (though they may cover this with a mask of bravado), wary of others and pessimistic about the future. They may also have missed out on the development of crucial skills for life, particularly conscious development, social and friendship skills, and the ability to control their emotions and their impulsiveness. Sadly, it may make it particularly hard for them to trust in any new caring relationships. Recent research has led to a greater understanding of how this early adversity affects brain development and therefore the brain abilities that a child has. Skills such as cause and effect thinking, logical and abstract thinking, anticipation skills, memory, impulse control and emotion regulation may be affected. Consequently, a child may be unable to do as you ask, rather than deliberately not doing so.